I’m glad to have finally learned that monitoring volcanoes is just a waste of taxpayer money. We can finally use those funds for something more useful! I don’t really know why anyone would want to pay attention to a volcano anyway. It’s not like people live on them, or like they kill anyone, or like they can cause massive property damage or anything like that. Whew!
(There is a more complete and less sarcastic response to this bullshit at Magma Cum Laude!)